Random Ass Check-In

When I left work today, I suddenly had a strange desire to drive up north to Evanston, near my aunt's place. For some reason, though I'm broke, I felt like going to my favorite little discount store. Class was cancelled tonight and even though I know I needed to come home and do my hair and the tons of homework backing up, that overwhelming desire to go bargain bin shopping wore me down. So, I said fuck it and went shopping.

It amazes me how digging for the best bargains on things you don't really need, can lead you to find things you do really want (that is once you see it of course). I bought a pair of the cutest jeans, with pink trimming for $13. Let me just add...I had to buy them a size smaller than usual, because my regular size was TOO BIG! Take that...bitches! I also bought a pair of blue & white striped Steve Madden galoshes for $8. (I've been hanging around the damn yuppies too much, first the Uggs, now some damn galoshes...go figure). And my total impulse purchase of the night was a pore cleanser/facial sauna for $10. I saw something similiar on a commercial a while back and decided that I needed one too.

For that hour I spent digging and sifting through racks, I felt like I didn't have a care in the world. It was like a weight had finally been lifted. However, all of that changed when I got to the register and had to come out of pocket. It changed again when I got home and realized that my bedroom is still absolutely filthy ...and some more as I sat to type this knowing I have tons of homework to do...and again as I caught a glimpse of my hair in the monitor....and some more as I remember I have to be at work tomorrow morning at 7:30...and even more as I think about how much I hate my job because I don't get paid enough. Damn...I'm screwed!!! How did I get so far off course?

Everything is piling up around me to the point that it feels like the trash, the homework, my hair, my job and my total lack of motivation will soon cave in on me. I haven't a clue as to how I am going to get anything done over these next two weeks. I have two major finals and two papers from an incomplete I took last quarter to finish in two weeks. If I even read two readings from either one of my classes this quarter, I'd be surprised. I've just coasted by without so much as a second thought, or more like without a single action.

At the end of the day...what's really sad is that, I don't care about not one of the things I listed above. The only thing I'm even remotely interested in right now is my Dave Chappelle Show marathon night with Safire and Summer next month!

Yeah, I'm completely fucked...AGAIN!